A Time For Everything: Our Life And Legacy

There is one passage from the Old Testament that people attending Christian funerals, and to a lesser extent, weddings, will be familiar with - Ecclesiastes 3:1-8.

At those most meaningful of transitions, whether from life to death, or the coming together of two unique souls in and through love, the writer of Ecclesiastes reminds us that there is indeed a time for everything.

Our lives are in constant flux. There is no other way. Imagine a life without the unbearable lows of loss, but also the indescribable beauty of being loved unconditionally? The depths we encounter are made meaningful by the highs: there is, in a very real sense, a time to weep, but also a time to laugh; a time for darkness, and a time for light.

Ecclesiastes explores those dynamics and polar opposites in language that is simple, yet profound:

'There is a time for everything,    

and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot,    

a time to kill and a time to heal,    

a time to tear down and a time to build,    

a time to weep and a time to laugh,    

a time to mourn and a time to dance,     

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,    

a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,     

a time to search and a time to give up,    

a time to keep and a time to throw away,     

a time to tear and a time to mend,    

a time to be silent and a time to speak,     

a time to love and a time to hate,    

a time for war and a time for peace'.

Yet, there is a reality that stretches out beyond this ancient and timeless wisdom. In Logotherapy & Existential Analysis we frame it in terms of 'legacy', that is, what we leave behind when we die.

In death we are stripped bare of all the world encourages us to strive for: wealth, power, status, admiration. None of that matters.

What does matter, and shapes the contours of that legacy, is the love we have shared, the compassion we have shown, the gratitude we have felt, the challenges we have met, and the manner in which we have confronted our imperfections.

The 'Death Bed Meditation' is an approach we employ in Logotherapy - it sounds morbid, but it is in fact very life affirming! It asks us to imagine that we are living out our last few moments: what is it that truly matters to us at that point?

What will we remember most: the experiences we have had, the people we have encountered, and the work we have done?

What is it that we would like to have done, but did not? Our regrets are just as important. They too speak to us of our core values and frustrations.

The aim of such introspection is to gain new perspectives and a clarity of thought at a time when we can make such changes, and not when we are literally at the end of our lives!

How we reshape our attitude to life to make it more meaningful and rich, and in-so-doing build a legacy, not of perfection, but of love and depth, is our responsibility. That is both daunting and liberating.

So yes, there is a time for everything.

And when it comes to change, that time is always now.