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Narcissism often puzzles those who encounter it, especially when it comes to how narcissistic individuals handle responsibility. One of the most confusing, destabilising and frustrating behaviours is the reversal of blame. Instead of owning up to mistakes or faults, narcissists frequently shift the blame onto others, leaving those around them feeling bewildered and unfairly targeted. This blog post explores the psychology behind this behaviour, why it happens, and how to reco

Gaslighting is a form of emotional manipulation that can leave deep scars on a person's sense of reality, self-worth and confidence. It often happens gradually, making it hard to recognise until much of the damage is done. But it can also occur over a relatively short period of time - weeks and months - depending on the context. Understanding what gaslighting involves and how it affects emotions is essential for anyone who wants to protect themselves or support others facing

Knowing whether to reach out to someone can feel like walking a tightrope. You may very much want to connect in whatever way, and for whatever reason, but you also worry about crossing boundaries or imposing. Our personality styles impact significantly on how we evaluate such circumstances. One of the prime issues is that of vulnerability: some are comfortable in that space, yet others find it threatening and frightening. To be vulnerable, and to reach out, demands that we a

Voluntary euthanasia remains one of the most controversial topics in medical ethics, especially when it relates to mental illness. While euthanasia for terminal physical conditions has gained some legal acceptance in various countries, extending this option to those suffering from severe mental illness raises a plethora of complex ethical questions. This post explores the key ethical challenges surrounding voluntary euthanasia for mental illness, balancing respect for autonom

Over the last year or so, I have been collating and publishing letters to my sons that explore important aspects of life. These aspects particularly relate to emotions, experiences, and the ability to self-reflect and grow. These letters are deeply personal, yet they have a universal application. Navigating life as a young man has never been easy. However, contemporary culture and expectations seem to make it particularly challenging. Insights from the Manosphere The recently

Logotherapy, a meaning-focused Psychotherapy developed by Viktor Frankl, treats heartbreak not as a pathology to be eliminated, but as a form of unavoidable suffering that can be transformed into personal growth . Absence is often the most painful aspect of heartbreak. There are a number of core ideas in Logotherapy that allow us to explore the contours of heartbreak from a unique perspective, both theoretically and practically. These include: The Existential Vacuum: Heartbre

Someone said to me once that being a Psychotherapist was 'a good wee job' ( a highly colloquial phrase, most commonly used in Scotland and Northern Ireland) where I could sit, drink tea, and chat with people all day'! There are many misconceptions when it comes to understanding what therapists actually do. The human connection component is pivotal, so in a sense sitting and chatting may not be so wide of the mark, at least during the phase where we are establishing that wor

Bullying is often seen as a behaviour linked to boys or men, but female bullies exist and can be just as harmful. Their tactics may differ however - more covert than overt - making it harder to identify them at first. Understanding the dynamics present in female bullies helps people recognize and address this behaviour before it causes lasting damage. This post explores some of their common traits and how we might better understand their behaviour, and its consequences, spec

Recently I received, with much sadness, the news that Jennifer Caligari, one of The Viktor Frankl Centre NI’s Logotherapy & Existential Analysis Diploma students, had passed away. Jennifer was a young woman who used her terminal cancer diagnosis to reach out to others. She was honest, brave, compassionate, and inspirational. Jennifer contacted me to an express an interest in the course and I was struck by her enthusiasm and practical understanding of meaning-based therapy. Sh

Love and narcissism often seem like opposing forces, yet Erich Fromm, a renowned social psychologist and philosopher, offers a compelling perspective that links the two in surprising ways. His work helps us understand how narcissism can affect our ability to love genuinely and how love itself can be a path to overcoming narcissistic tendencies. In 'The Art of Loving', Fromm explores the interplay between love and narcissism in some depth. In this following excerpt, he makes s

Healing is a deeply personal journey, and finding the right path can often feel overwhelming. Over time, I have come to appreciate the value of approaches that blend empathy, understanding, and practical strategies. Every therapist has their own style based on their personality, experience, and training. I would describe my style as reflective, encouraging, affirming, accessible, and sometimes challenging; I employ that approach to help clients effectively address mental heal

The Viktor Frankl Centre NI www.viktorfranklcentreni.com ​ Diploma in Logotherapy & Existential Analysis Click Here The Diploma in Logotherapy and Existential Analysis is an advanced programme for existing Therapists/Counsellors, Psychiatrists, Psychologists, Social Workers, and others with relevant expertise and professional standing. ​ The course is fully Accredited by the International Society of Logotherapy and Existential Analysis at the Viktor Frankl Institute Vienna. F

When life presents us with difficult experiences, finding the right support can feel overwhelming. Trauma, in particular, can leave deep emotional wounds that affect our daily lives and relationships. Fortunately, the rise of technology has made it possible to access professional help from the comfort of our own homes. In this post, I want to share some insights into the benefits of online trauma therapy, highlighting how this approach can offer healing and hope in a gentle,

We may wonder from time-to-time if we are surrounding ourselves with the right people; such questions can arise from disappointment, heartache, or an uneasy realisation that all is not what it should be. The actor Rachel Boston expressed what matters most when she said, 'Being surrounded by love and people that care about your heart is the dream. That's what I would like on my last day.' It might seem like to much to ask that this maxim not only applies to our 'last day', but

As I write the course materials for the Diploma in Logotherapy & Existential Analysis, I am reflecting on love and its centrality to the human experience. We Logotherapists are cognisant of that and it is very much part of how we approach therapy. We will be, amongst many other texts, exploring Pablo Neruda’s Sonnet XVII from 100 Love Sonnets (1959). It is a profoundly intimate, non-traditional, and thought-provoking love poem that rejects superficial romance for a deeper, al

I have decided to relinquish my accreditation as a Consultant EMDR Therapist (and EMDR Therapist) and instead focus entirely on my role as a Logotherapist & Existential Analyst - seeing clients, and continuing to develop teaching/training and supervision through the Viktor Frankl Centre Northern Ireland. My passion has always been for Logotherapy, and to a lesser extent, Jungian Psychology and these modalities have always constituted the core of my practice. I look forward to

There are times in our lives when we choose to be silent. There are a myriad reasons why we make that choice. We may feel emotionally overwhelmed, or fear that our words do not matter, or that they may make a situation worse. We might feel misunderstood, or choose silence because we are experiencing shame, or we simply believe that, for whatever reason, it is the right thing to do. Whatever the context, silence is a powerful means of communication; where our words are inadequ

The shocking Epstein scandal that is engulfing politics, public life, and big business in the USA and across the globe, is a case study in greed, narcissism, and criminality writ large. Underpinning much of the narrative we see unfolding on a daily basis is a sense of entitlement that characterises the protagonists in this sordid story. Such entitlement cruelly casts aside human dignity and denies the inherent value of each person, seeking to dehumanise the vulnerable, regard

John Steinbeck was an American Writer who won the 1962 Nobel Prize in Literature, famous for such classics as 'The Grapes of Wrath', 'Of Mice and Men', 'East of Eden', and 'Cannery Row'. Although I have read all of the above over the years, I have found myself drawn to a beautiful letter he wrote to his 14 year old son, Thom, who was at boarding school at the time. Steinbeck offered gentle, but poignant fatherly advice after Thom confessed he had fallen in love with a girl na

Prayer often brings to mind religious rituals, sacred spaces, and specific beliefs. Yet, there is a growing practice known as secular prayer that offers a way to connect with oneself and the world without relying on religious frameworks. This form of prayer focuses on mindfulness, intention (personal values, hopes, gratitude, compassion, kindness) and reflection, making it accessible to people of all backgrounds. The core idea is to create a meaningful pause in the day to con